Archive for August, 2013

Random Thoughts – Thursday, August 29, 2013

August 29, 2013

Barack Obama

“They did not die in vain. Their victory was great. But we would dishonor those heroes, as well, to suggest that the work of this nation is somehow complete. The arc of the moral universe may bend towards justice, but it doesn’t bend on its own.”

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I have never in my life ever rooted for any team playing for the University of Alabama and in fact, had there ever been a game in any sport, including tiddlywinks, between Alabama and say, Nazi Germany, I would have most likely have rooted for the Nazis or at the very least, bet on them to cover the spread. However, know this: when Alabama travels to College Station TX to play the Aggies on September 14, I will be rooting for the Crimson Tide to beat the living shit out of Johnny “Autographs” Manziel with the fervor and gusto of someone breaking a 7-day fast at an all-you-can-cram-down-your-throat Chinese buffet on a Friday night after cashing his or her paycheck.

Am I the only one who wonders why Colin Powell insists on remaining a Republican?

And now, N’Sync will return to the Land of Invisibility, Irrelevance and Obscurity.

ATTENTION STUDENTS OF TRUMP UNIVERSITY: The Freeman Institute of BS, Procrastination and Tattoo Interpretation will allow you to transfer immediately without transcripts as long as you can make payment through our Pay Pal account which is routed through Ghana by way of Compton.

Breaking News: Tavis Smiley and Cornel West blame President Obama for Justin Timberlake’s success at the expense of Usher.

“Bye, Bye Bye.” What Justin Timberlake said to the rest of N’Sync after their performance at the VMAs Sunday night.

Dez Bryant – 10 game suspension for lying about having dinner with Deion Sanders. Terrelle Pryor – 5 game suspension for exchanging his game worn jersey and other items for tattoos. Reggie Bush – Heisman Trophy taken back, records from USC national championship season stricken and school forced to give up title and accept onerous probation, bowl bans and scholarship limits for several seasons. Johnny Manziel – 30 minute (1st half of first game against Rice) suspension after signing hundreds, perhaps thousands of items for memorabilia dealers that he claims to have just met and didn’t know. Let’s see, Bryant, Pryor and Bush are American-Americans from modest means with no way to hire an attorney; Manziel comes from a wealthy white family with the connections, money and power to hire attorneys and tell both Texas A&M and the NCAA to “kiss our asses.”

I CAN NOT wait – pun fully intended – for Chris Christie to run for president so the whole nation can see what a truly vicious bully he really is.

I can’t be the only one who wishes John Madden would have been on hand to break down Miley Cyrus’ VMAs “performance”, right? “See Al, now when she grinds her ass against Thicke’s crotch right here – BOOM! – it took all the control he could come up with not to explode. Then, when Miley rubs herself right here – BOOM – well, let me tell ya. As the old coach of the Raiders, let me tell ya, I thought back to some of the players’ wives we had on those teams.”

I don’t know what I’m less excited about: Dannity Kane reuniting or the news that there will be a “Madea” Christmas movie later this year.

I think Miley Cyrus looks cute…in a trailer park whorish lost her virginity at 14 to a meth head in a trailer park and now she’s a stripper/single mom of three kids by 4 different men and hoping to get her GED after she goes on Maury kind of way.

Isn’t P. Diddy too old to be still getting into “beefs” at night clubs?

Johnny Manziel and his “people” want us to believe that he went to several locations at different times and signed hundreds, possibly thousands of items for people he just happened to run into and NO money changed hands? “Can you spell bullshit boys and girls? I knew you could.”

Let’s be honest, the GOP uses “Obamacare” instead of the ACA or Affordable Care Act like the “N-word.” You know it, I know it, they know it, they know we know it and they still don’t care.

Miley Cyrus is that white girl who tried to hang out with the black girls who got bused into her school.

Never, ever underestimate the power of just being nice to someone for no reason at all. You never know when or how you’ll be blessed for doing so but believe me, he knows when you’ve been naughty or nice.

Rumor has Mint Condition, Force M.D.’s and Jermaine Jackson and his real hair reuniting on BET Awards next year.

Things the rest of N’Sync have been saying since Sunday night: “Got any spare change?”, “Paper or plastic?”, “Pump that gas for you ma’am?”, “Do you have any coupons today?” and “Do you know who I am officer?”

Uh, exactly what is Dannity Kane “coming back” from and why?

When not one single Republican member of Congress accepted an invitation to attend and/or speak at the 50th anniversary of the March on Washington, you know that the GOP has stopped even pretending to care about or like black people anymore.

When will R. Kelly reunite with Public Announcement? That’s what I want to know!


Random Thoughts – Monday, August 19, 2013

August 19, 2013


Just finished reading this book and the Republican primary campaign was summed up for me by the following quote from Jon Huntsman on page 181: “What went through my head – and I hope this doesn’t sound egotistical – what went through my head was in this country of 315 million people, Nobel Prize winners, university presidents, CEOs, creative class leaders, innovators, great people, this is what we get to run for president? This is it? How come we’ve got this? They’re [the GOP candidates] all good people, but they’re not the best that this country has to offer.”

After Ryan Braun of the Brewers, suspended for the last 65 games of this season, issues his “apology” or whatever he’ll say sometime this week about having lied about his use of PEDs in 2011 when he won the National League MVP award, he should never open his mouth in public again beyond, “Hello”, “Thank you” and “Goodbye” because he really is just a bad human being.

All the people proclaiming “Breaking Bad” as the best show on TV right now apparently haven’t seen “Tyler Perry’s The Haves and Have Nots” on OWN.

How come no one ever did a song, “I’m In Love with a Mormon”?

I wonder which “pastor” will be the first to lose his church behind “Preachers of L.A.”

Interesting tidbit about A-Rod’s being hit with a pitch by Ryan Dempster of the Red Sox during last night’s game: while his manager, Joe Girardi, defended him so vigorously that he was ejected from the game, not a single one of his Yankees teammates came out on the field to support him. NOT A ONE.

One doesn’t need more proof that GMA has clearly replaced Today as the #1 morning news show than Lady Gaga unveiling her new video there this morning.

One thing to remember about guys like Stephen Colbert, Bill Maher and Jon Stewart: just like the Rush Limbaughs of the right, at their core, they’re just performers being paid for their “act.”

One thing to remember in all this and something that A-Rod’s side will surely bring up: Yankees GM Brian Cashman was dead set against re-signing him after he opted-out of his contact after 2007 season.

Say what you will about Matt Lauer and whether or not you believe he helped Ann Curry get fired, but he absolutely DESTROYED A-Rod’s attorney during an interview this morning.

Say what you will, but Pam Oliver’s weave seems to be in mid-season form already!

That silence you hear on the right is them trying desperately to disassociate themselves from the whole “Ted Cruz Was Born In Canada” mess.

This is going to end badly for A-Rod when it’s all said and done because you can believe that the Yankees were covering their asses on EVERYTHING when it came to him.

This whole Kendrick Lamar Vs Everybody beef reminds me of the time Midnight Star called out Earth, Wind & Fire, the Commodores, Funkadelic, the Brothers Johnson, Rufus, L.T.D. and Kool and the Gang.

Uh oh. I was flipping through the channels and came across the halftime-studio portion of the Colts/Giants game. I’m not saying this panel – Rhonde Barber, jay Glazer, Randy Moss and Brian Urlacher – is “grammar challenged”, but FOX may have to use subtitles.

We’re THIS close to learning that A-Rod once took money out of a blind beggar’s cup and covered the eyes of his guide dog while he did it.

When did all this “First Lady” nonsense start in black churches?

Where he was born is the least of the reasons why Ted “Grandpa Munster” Cruz won’t be the GOP nominee in 2016 let alone be elected POTUS.

You don’t HAVE to see “The Butler”, but you really SHOULD see it!



August 5, 2013

The Reunion Front Cover


Music industry executive Lorenzo (Chocks) Taylor awoke drenched in sweat at 4:30 in the morning. Darkness engulfed the master bedroom suite in his Hollywood Hills home; his neighborhood of winding streets and secluded houses hidden behind high gates and walls was quiet in the hours before dawn in Los Angeles. He sat upright in bed, listening to the silence, his mind racing with thoughts of where his life might be headed in the next few weeks.

It was mid-August 2013 and during the coming weekend, he’d be attending his 20-year high school reunion in San Diego, California. It was an event that Lorenzo was eyeing with a combination of excitement and dread. The former because he’d be seeing his old crew, four guys that he’d known practically all his life, and the latter because Lorenzo realized that this milestone put him just two short years away from the Big 4-0. He’d also tried to find out if his old girlfriend, Tina Davis, was attending but so far, her name wasn’t on the list of those who’d registered. Then there were was tonight.

For the first time in ten years, Lorenzo was looking for a new job. It wasn’t that he wanted a new one per se; generally speaking, he was happy with his current one. And under normal circumstances, he wouldn’t think of leaving the company where he’d spent the past ten years of his very successful career. A career that had brought Lorenzo a long, long way from his days as a free-lance songwriter/producer.

But circumstances were no longer normal at Wilshire Records a year after the company’s sale to a Japanese conglomerate. Lorenzo, used to doing pretty much whatever he wanted when it came to getting his artists’ projects completed, was growing increasingly frustrated with the monetary restrictions imposed by the new owners. And if the rumors he was hearing about even more cost-cutting measures once the current company-wide review was finally finished were true, things were probably going to get worse before they got better.

Three months ago, when he’d asked his lawyer, Phillip Walker, to discreetly look around and see if there were any available jobs at other record companies that he might be interested in pursuing, Lorenzo figured nothing would really interest him. He knew that positions for a senior level executive with his track record were far and few between and seldom came open, especially not on the West Coast. Plus, he wanted to spend more time in the studio, producing 2-3 artists a year, and that would have to be included in any new contract he signed and might be a deal breaker for most companies.

So, when Phillip called three days ago and said that the president of Montclair Records, Sylvia Andrews, wanted to meet with him, Lorenzo was intrigued. Known as a sharp executive, Andrews had the reputation of being a fierce competitor and ruthless operator who felt right at home among her male counterparts in the rough and tumble world of the music business. While he’d never worked with her, Lorenzo had met Sylvia on several occasions such as awards shows and other music industry events and admired her accomplishments. The only real drawback was that even though Montclair had a satellite office in LA, their headquarters was in New York and Lorenzo had no real desire to live there.

As he changed the sweat-soaked sheets and pillowcases on his bed, Lorenzo thought about the meeting he and Phillip were scheduled to have that evening with Sylvia. He figured that she must have something in mind, even though he or Phillip hadn’t been able to find out what it might be. But they were both convinced that she did because Sylvia Andrews wasn’t known to waste her time having a meeting just to have one.

Unable to fall back asleep as dawn approached, Lorenzo decided to go for a run around near-by Lake Hollywood. As the sun came up over the city that had been home to him for the past fifteen years, he ran and listened to Tupac on his iPhone. Exercise always helped Lorenzo put in a good frame of mind and after putting in five miles on the circuitous path around the lake, it was with a much clearer head that he walked home.

As he soaked in his Jacuzzi tub and watched Sports Center on the flat-screen TV mounted on the wall above him, Lorenzo was hit with a sudden, electric thought: what if Sylvia Andrews actually offered him a job tonight?

Random Thoughts – Saturday, August 3, 2013

August 3, 2013

Anthony Weiner

“About this big, but keep in mind, that’s when I’m ‘excited’.”

Am I the only one struck by the irony of Anthony Weiner saying “I don’t know how to quit” [the NYC mayoral race] when it’s fairly apparent that he didn’t (or maybe still doesn’t) know how to quit sexting with women other than his wife?

Anthony Weiner has fallen to fourth in the most recent polls of the five candidates running for mayor in NYC. What I want to know is how bad is the person that’s in fifth place.

A-Rod is either the most delusional human being ever or a master negotiator. And for him, the line between the two is razor-thin.

Every time you think the Anthony Weiner story simply can’t get any stranger, it does.

Everything that A-Rod isn’t and never will be: The Captain, #2 in your program, Derek Jeter!

If your mom or dad are porn performers, is it better to bring them for Career Day or Show and Tell?

Is the Riley Cooper N-word situation a “teachable moment” that a lot of good could come from? Michael Vick is his teammate and has publicly acknowledged that he forgives Cooper but doesn’t understand why he said what he did. Could a series of PSAs with Cooper and Vick side-by-side, shown during NFL games this season, be an opportunity for a message that many Americans of all ages, races and colors need to hear?

James Brown is/was THE greatest live performer of all time and on their best nights, Michael Jackson and Prince couldn’t wear the Godfather of Soul’s cape.

Man, I’d hate to see what Ariel Castro considers a “monster.” SMH

Some of the black people who are calling for the head of Riley Cooper today – figuratively not literally – are some of the same ones who defended Roland S. Martin’s anti-gay tweet during the 2012 Super Bowl broadcast. I’m not accusing them of having double standards, but…

Something to think about: only one Republican currently being mentioned as a potential 2016 presidential candidate, Jeb Bush, is over 55 (he’s 60) while Hillary Clinton and Joe Biden, the current leaders among potential Democratic candidates will be 69 and 73 respectively.

The fact that the Nationals are now 11 games behind the Braves are more proof that when they were real contenders last season, they truly mishandled the whole Stephen Strasburg situation.

The real dilemma with A-Rod is that he’s told so many lies over the years that except for the few hard-core fans of his – a number that probably dwindles by the hour – that he has almost no defenders on his team or in the media.

While I admire and respect Mr. Harry Belafonte a great deal, why do I have the feeling that he’s just trying to get some late-in-life “shine” off Jay-Z?

Why do Eric Cantor and Eric Ryan always look like Eddie Haskell wearing their dad’s hand-me down suits that don’t fit just right?

Would God narrate the “Morgan Freeman Story”?

You might be a ho when the announcement of your pregnancy requires you to issue a statement, “I’m not an adultress.” IJS

You’ve got to really NEED a job if you’re working for Anthony Weiner, especially if you’re a woman.