Ten Things You’ll Never Read or Hear Said

  1. Richard Simmons is a man’s man.
  2. And the Nobel Prize for Peace goes to Osama bin Laden.
  3. Gee Congressman Boehner, you look a little pale today.
  4. Ladies and gentleman, your NBA champion Los Angeles Clippers.
  5. Knight and Day is a great movie!
  6. Wow, Mary J. Blige stayed on key for the whole song.
  7. Those Kardashian girls sure are a classy bunch.
  8. And the Academy Award goes to Tyler Perry.
  9. Welcome to Israel Minister Farrakhan.
  10. President-elect Sarah Palin.
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